One last tango before the cruel summer

A bizarre sexual orientation has governed the student newspaper at UNC-Greensboro for years — see, for example, here, here, and most recently here. So what will its editors choose to run as its last words to students for the semester?

Well, first there is a column to get them started on a summer without the Carolinian‘s no doubt helpful and timely advice. Sex columnist (and gosh, who better to teach about sex than a college student, right?) Brook Tayler chimes in with “The Erogenous Zone: Recommended reading for a sexy summer,” the basis for which is stated at the beginning:

Since this is my last article until the fall semester, I want to leave you all with some sexy stuff you can enjoy all summer and beyond. That is why I have decided to bring your attention to great online sex resources. I have included some porn sites, but because we all need more that just stimulation from time to time, you will also find information-based websites.

Hard to argue with that reasoning! One site is recommended because it “features short clips of every kind of sex you could ever imagine. You can find straight, bisexual and lesbian videos right next to the more interest-driven ones like fetishes and BDSM. The best thing about this site, other than its great variety, is that you can check back every day and there will be something new to titillate you.” Mirabile dictu!

The article reaches a thoughtful conclusion:

Whatever you are into sexually can be found on the Internet. I for one think that’s a beautiful thing. Everyone should take advantage of the online sexual resources that are out there since there is something for everyone….

Yes, everything you could always want sexually is on the Internet. As far as the acts themselves. Real intimacy is another matter, but it’s considered impolite to discuss such a thing anyway.

Speaking of intimacy, the Carolinian doesn’t want you to — er, that is, the paper doesn’t want you to think it’s something you can achieve with just one person. That’s why it features an op-ed called “Polyamory works.” Written by a “Jady Adewar,” this op-ed makes the point that

Polyamory is not a cure for anything, and assuming that is naive of anyone. It is about loving people, and being loved by people. It is not about sex, it is not about “fixing” relationships… it’s simply about love. Many people doubt that love exists, but those who embrace this lifestyle want to surround themselves in what is pure and true.

Strangely enough, Adewar’s op-ed is in response to a columnist’s statement that “polygamy doesn’t work,” but she is not discussing the merits of polygamy. Perhaps someone else can likewise “refute” the statement with an article in favor of the movie Pollyanna.

Polyamory is a euphemism for having multiple sexual partners, of course. And Adewar makes the case that “polyamory” is “something that you are within”:

have you ever wondered why so many people consider homosexuality a lifestyle? Homosexuality isn’t a choice, and neither is being poly. Polyamory is about the need and the devotion you have to love others. A woman can have 10 children and love them all equally, but she can only love one man? Love isn’t limited: it is the basis of this lifestyle.

It’s cute how Adewar conflates two entirely different kinds of love, agape and eros. Still, no doubt UNCG is even now preparing a Polyamorists Student Center, to be furnished with mattresses instead of couches, out of love, of course …

So who is this Adewar person? Well, on her website (warning: graphic and potentially offensive material — surprised?), she writes,

I have been in the BDSM lifestyle for almost a year now (As of July, 2004). I would hardly call myself an expert, but many of the opinions I posess are shared by many others.

The beauty of this lifestyle is there are no Rights or Wrongs. Every person is different, and we all share seperate beliefs and have different tastes. If I told you that a person could not live a happy, normal life without eating cheese every night, you would hardly accept such a silly opinion. If something works for one person, it doesn’t mean that it is automatically “the norm”.

Good point! Speaking of cheese, here are her “interests”:

* Spanking
* Knife Play
* Group Sex
* Fantasy Rape
* Bondage
* Erotica
* (Fantasy) Incest
* Ageplay
* Sex Toys
* Vampirism
* Being a slut overall…

Why, no wonder the Carolinian publishes her! Hey, but just in case you’re worried, you can rest assured in one thing. Adewar states categorically that

I do NOT commit or approve of incest, rape, murder, or anything else violent and illegal that appear on this website. They are works of fiction. Only that, nothing more.

Glad we got that cleared up! It’s not sick to fantasize about rape and incest and murder — that’s “polyamory,” and it works!